Sunday, November 9, 2014
A Worthy Goal
I have never fancied myself a competitive person. Sure, I played some competitive sports and I certainly didn't like losing. But when things got really blood thirsty, I checked out. Even in law school I didn't hardly entertain the thought of competing with my classmates, except for that one time I found out a got a better grade in Contracts than one of the smartest guys in my class. But who wouldn't be stoked at that kind of validation?
So I'm not quite sure why I struggle to be truly happy for people in their successes. Instead I find myself being resentful. Mostly because I don't understand how I haven't found my own success. Sure, I've achieved some pretty difficult feats like, you know, finding a husband. And graduating from that law school thing. Keeping a couple of tiny humans alive. So what more am I looking for?
I guess I'm still looking for that something that I'm really kick-ass, like expert good at, although I mostly think of myself as a Jill-of-all-trades. Or that BIG idea that's going to make all of our financial worries a thing of the past!
So for now, I'll keep looking. But while I'm at it, I'll get over myself. Because I really do hope we all make it!